Wouldn’t it be good if we could comprehend the true meaning during a difficult conversation? We could listen ‘below the line’ or ‘underneath’ for nuances, clues, unspoken messages and non- verbal signals. How can we can do this without an actual third ear?

  • Be present, alert and give 100% attention to words, tone, body language, eyes, attitude, energy.
  • Welcome silence and invite the other person to feel safe and comfortable to speak.
  • Open your heart and mind to accept the other person’s experience.
  • Let the other person speak first.
  • You will have the other person’s attention when they are not distracted and thinking about what they want to say.
  • Show respect and genuine interest; build trust.
  • Stay focused on the person in front of you.
  • People feel respected and accepted when they are understood and acknowledged.
  • The emotional connection created by this kind of communication is powerful!

When communication is honest and clear, a relationship is built on a rock of understanding, respect and trust. A relationship built on shifting sand feels unpredictable and unsafe. We will not experience the best of someone when they are guarded.